Silence rang all around me as I sat back, alone. I stared out the small window as the silver moonlight shined into my bedroom, brightening the picture I had pushed down in my anger. I tore my gaze away, tears rushing down my cheeks without my permission. I clutched a soft pillow against my chest as I sobbed, my life changing in front of me. I saw our memories flash before my eyes and I tightly closed them, my heart twisting. What happened?
Why now? I couldnâ€™t shut off my mind as it raced with too many unanswered questions. I felt my world crashing down, shattering. Pain racked my body, the blood in my veins running painstakingly fast. This day was supposed to be perfect, but instead of beauty I am now left with this miserable heartbreak. Iâ€™m left with not knowing.
I shakily stood up and walked to my dresser, picking up the picture of us. I ran my index finger along him, gasping for breath as I gazed at us. At how happy we were. Our smiles were bright; the way he was looking at me had a small glimmer of hope. His hand was resting lightly on my leg, the other carelessly thrown behind me. We were facing each other, laughing as we talked.
It was beautiful.
I pressed the picture to my heart for a few moments, feeling the cold frame against my skin before yanking open the first drawer I touched and tossing it in, slamming it closed. I couldnâ€™t do it. I let my gaze roam my room, searching for any evidence of him ever being there.
After a few minutes of looking I gave up, blinded by the memories that happened in here. Blinded by the way heâ€™d talk, the way heâ€™d causally lay on my bed like it was his. The way Iâ€™d let him go through my things when he was looking for something. I leaned back against my dresser, my breathing ragged as I remembered.
I slid to the floor, burying my face against my knees as I was racked by more sobs. I was racked by anger, love, hatredâ€”everything I was feeling came at me all at once and I let it. I felt worthless, useless. Nobody could care. This just proves it.
I gave up everything to be with him, and he leaves me hanging. He never thought one single thought about me otherwise this wouldnâ€™t have happened. He should have let everyone slip into his mind. Why didnâ€™t he?
I cried the night away, the moonlight changing into predawn. A new day quickly came charging at us, leaving the sorrow filled one behind. I sighed as I glanced at my clock, surprised at how early it still was. I caught sight of myself in the mirror and shivered at how I looked. I quickly turned away, knowing I shouldnâ€™t care. That I should just be able to pick myself back up except I canâ€™t.